The cat, a pool, and friends

Moly Cate, the little girl who made me an aunt, turned ten this week so we headed to Germantown to celebrate.  The cousins, as my children refer to them, have a cat that had kittens.  I am not a cat person so being around cats was somewhat exciting to my kiddos, especially Annie.  

When Ford is bored, what does he do???   He makes a baseball field on the kitchen table!!!

It's all kinds of steamy hot in Mayberry.  We must thank God for the country club pool or we'd never go outside!

Anna Greer even loves the pool!

Annie is in it for the snacks.

Ford's skin is so dark.  That child can tan like none other.

We must thank the good Lord that swimming lessons are over!!!!   My gosh!!!! It's disturbing when your child wakes up crying and lying about being sick five days in a row because he hates swimming lessons.  I'd say anyone age 40 and under, from Mayberry, has all taken lessons from the same lady.  She means business.  She's tough.  She doesn't do crying, complaining or whining.  Ohhhh those kids fear her.

I love her.  I think she's fabulous.  I want to bring her home with me because she made Bitty's butt act right.  He's terrified, and it worked well for him.  He hated going each day, but when it was over he was proud of himself.  Yay Bitty!!!

And Mrs. Elizabeth even brought him a Paw Patrol puzzle for completing lessons.

These two!!!!

Happy and sad news.... One of my babysitters I've had for 7 years had a baby this week.  I'm sad she's retired but so happy she's got a precious little guy!!!

Y'all I don't get out much.  It's extremely rare that I get out without Fancy, but last night I did.  A good friend, and one of my roommates senior year, (my side of the table... last girl) lives in Jackson Hole, Wyoming.  Well, she came home for a few days and several of us met in Oxford for dinner.  It was so nice catching up, discussing life and laughing.  Friends are good for the soul.

You know on Mother's Day I never blogged about my mom.  I just couldn't bring myself to do it.  The day before Mother's Day was actually brutal.  I took her new flowers to the cemetery.  I promised her I'd look after her grave, and I just cried that day.  A lot.  By myself.  I asked God why did he think at age 33 I didn't need my mom anymore?   I clearly disagree... I do need her.  There have been some family changes in the last little bit and I need to talk to her.

It's been over 5 months.  The scent on her robe is almost gone.  I've got it wadded up in a ball.  I open it up and bury my face inside and breathe in as much as I can.  Some days I pass by her robe and think it'll be too much for me to smell it, and then I remind myself the smell is barely lingering on and I better savor it.  

Ford brings her up all the time and cries about missing her.  I think of all that she's already missed and how much more going forward she won't know about.  When Ford is upset about his Gran I remind him that Heaven is so awesome she wouldn't want to come back even if she didn't have that "stupid cancer" as he calls it.  It hurts knowing Annie has zero memory of her.  She only had 10 months here with Sister, but she loved that baby.  Ohhh she loved her.  She wanted so desperately for me to have a little girl so she and I could have the same relationship mom and I did.  You know I think God gave us Annie because he knew there would be dark days and she would bring some light.

Grief is hard.  It's tough.  It doesn't go away.  Your feelings and emotions will change, but the hurt is there.  Emotional pain is terrible.  It's absolutely terrible.  Knowing what I know now about losing someone so close to me makes me beyond terrified to live through the death of someone else near and dear to my heart.  

I feel like month five has been the hardest yet on me.  Why.... I don't know.  But it has.  I just long to hear her voice... we always got off the phone the same way, we'd say "love".  I have a voicemail and that's how she signed off... "love".  Ohhh that woman was special to me and I miss her so much.  Love your people.  Love them big and a lot.  No one is promised tomorrow.